You know what I'm talking about....well, unless you are a perfectionist housecleaner who takes off your couch cushions daily and vaccums every crevice possible. (P.S. that's not me). Don't get me wrong, I WANT to be that person. I want to be able to have a perfectly swept, dusted, mopped floors, windows cleaned, ceiling fans sparkling, dreamy smelling home. I want to have two loaves of bread baking daily and a pot of homemade soup on my glistening stove top. You know, the stove top you need a pair of sunglasses to even look at it becaused it's THAT shiny clean? The house where every book on the bookshelf is neatly placed to be as feng shui as possible and of course, never but one pair of underwear for each resident of the house dirty at one time. Yeah, that's who I WANT to be.
Yet, this GIF above is who I would have to say I am more accurately to be. No, I don't day drink (unless on a beach in Cozumel), but yes, that is what the outside of my refrigerator looks like. I also don't live like a pig by any means. In fact, sometimes I am flabbergasted when someone tells me how nice the house looks! (and she laughed and laughed and laughed lol). I guess it's because I tend to be the "crumbs in the couch" type of housewife. I can often times (to those who don't KNOW me) look like I might just have it all together. As I have mentioned before, as a mom with ADHD not diagnosed until 39 years of age, you could say I became the Houdini of "fake it till ya make it." I didn't have a choice. None of us who have neuro divergent brains, paired with other obstacles like depression, anxiety and chronic health issues do. Usually we are living on the edge of "fake it till ya make it" ,or suicidal tendencies or thoughts. Praise be to God, I chose early on in life through the hope I knew I had in Christ, that even though those latter thoughts have plagued me at times in earlier years, it was always a choice I knew I never had nor would ever make. So "fake it till ya make it" was my jam and I think I pulled it off pretty "middle o' the road" style.
However, there are many of us that live with the "crumbs in the couch" lifestyle and it doesn't mean we have ADHD or mental illness. You know what I mean. The house where everything has it's place, smells semi decent, carpets clean and floors tidy (ish.) . Enough anyway, that at first glance, your house looks GREAT to the unseeming eye. Yet, behind closed doors, your bed isn't made and your game closet is a nightmare. If opened, Life and Monopoly will be taking up your next hour of the day as you clean up the splattered boxes strewn everywhere after they both came tumbling down. Your couch, neatly decorated with soft, plush pillows with the new cute, trendy saying for the year, "Love lives here" or something to that regard compliements your house beautifully. Yet, underneath those soft leather cushions lies kernels of popcorn and granola bar wrappers. A few coins, a broken pencil, a dust bunny or six, and a chewed up juice box straw. If you're super lucky, you'll even find the TV remote! See, undereath that beautiful, soft, decorated couch with your fireplace lit and warm, lies weeks, maybe (usually) months, of mess. The mess that reminds you of your lack of housekeeping skills and children who don't follow directions. ("I SAID NO FOOD IN THE DEN!") The dust bunnies are a stark reminder of how possibly long it's been since you last moved the couch to vaccum, which then reminds you of how overcomitted you have been these last few months...which then goes in to more mom guilt of thinking how little time you have spent with your spouse and kids, when really you were just trying to do all these OTHER things to make them happy and possibly better your life as an entire family!
OOOF!!! Is it just me? Please say it's not just me.
Whether you are a "crumbs in the couch" wife and/or mother, or you are the type who literally can't sleep knowing there is one dish left or possibly a kernel or five fell into the couch cushion crack as you watched a movie for family movie night, we are ALL seen in the exact same light in our Father's eyes. Isn't that so comforting?! He knows our hearts. He knows his Marys and He knows his Marthas. He never asked us to be perfect housekeepers and he didn't condone being lazy slob housewives either. What he DID say, was,
"Be faithful, even to the point of death, and I will give you the crown of life." Revelation 2:10
So you see, it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks of you. It doesn't matter if your house looks like a franchise of Magnolia, or your white trim is looking more off white and is speckled here and there with things like spaghetti sauce or shoe scuffmarks.....your Savior loves you both the same. He DELIGHTS in knowing that it isn't how clean your house is, but your why. He knows your struggles. He also knows the tidiness and cleanliness of your home doesn't necessarily show your heart. You can be the cleanest, tidiest, type A housekeeper in the world, but a condescending, selfish or obsessive heart isn't God-pleasing either. He also knows a mother with the speckled white trim, the mounds of clean (or unclean) unfolded laundry and the "I have no idea what to make for supper and it's 5'o clock," doesn't usually mean she doesn't care deeply and love her family fiercely. She MOST often wants to be like Martha up the street, but her Mary personality continues to get in the way of those tasks that produce the visual results. Yet, the Mary can also be caught in selfish sin by avoiding those tasks she doesn't naturally gravitate too, because she'd rather chat with a friend, workout a little longer, or watch another episode of The Handmaid's Tale. (guilty). The one thing that matters, is what is inside our hearts when it comes to the love and command from our Savior.
The one thing NEEDFUL, is what has come and been gifted TO US from our reigning Savior.
Oh, what sweet joy the sentence gives, of knowing my Redeemer lives!
xoxox
Check out my latest podcast episode of "For such a time as this" HERE!
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